1 May, 2016
British Breakfast Foods
12 British Breakfast Foods America Is Seriously Missing Out On
The most luxurious of the quick breakfasts. Far superior to the English muffin thanks to their butter-absorbing holes. Delicious with just butter, or with Marmite or jam. Pretty much the nicest thing you can put in a toaster.
2. Marmite on toast
America is seriously lacking in savoury breakfast options. And even if you do have a savoury breakfast they tend to cover it in syrup. Which is probably why they don’t get Marmite. America, you are missing out on this simple pleasure.
3. Black pudding
Sure, a sausage made out of blood doesn’t sound delicious, or look delicious, but it tastes delicious. Crumbly, savoury, meaty goodness is the perfect way to start your day.
4. Proper pancakes
Cooked in a pan, not on a griddle. Pancakes that you can roll up and fill with lemon and sugar, or Nutella. Pancakes that cook in about two minutes. Pancakes how pancakes are meant to be.
5. Scotch pancakes
They may kind of look like your pancakes, but I can assure you they are far superior. First of all, you buy them in a packet and put them in a toaster. Secondly, you don’t cover them in syrup. Syrup is vulgar. Jam and cream is classy. And of course just butter is glorious.
6. Proper bacon
By which we mean bacon that contains actual meat and isn’t just burnt fat. Although, granted, you do need some burnt fat. What you guys eat all the time we call streaky bacon, and we tend to use it only when we’re cooking something French. Back bacon is what we live on, preferably in a sandwich.
7. Beans on toast
Heinz is an American company, but somehow you’re still eating their food all wrong. Beans are clearly a breakfast food. They are hearty and warm, and go very nicely with eggs and bacon.
8. Brown sauce
Imagine ketchup, but more savoury. Pretty much just vinegar in paste form, but it’s actually delicious and goes with anything.
9. Actually nice milk
Why does your milk taste so weird? What do you do to it? Why doesn’t it ever go off? Have you heard of a cow?
10. Bubble and squeak
Leftovers are a crucial food source for all slightly incapable adults, and in Britain we decided to give them a fun name. Bubble and squeak traditionally consists of leftover potatoes and cabbage mashed together and fried. And unsurprisingly it’s delicious.
11. The fry-up
Otherwise know as the full English/full Scottish/Welsh/Irish breakfast. Whatever you call it, and whatever regional delicacies you include, there is no denying that this is the king of breakfasts. It’s full of meat and carbs and usually contains at least one vegetable, it’s salty and greasy, and it’s never covered in syrup. The perfect breakfast.
12. Anything from Greggs
Imagine the scene: You’re slightly hungover and you have to go to work, and it’s raining. There is only one cure: Greggs. Usually some kind of meat wrapped in some kind of carb. Found on pretty much every high street, and in every station in Britain. How does America do anything without Greggs.